When A Partner Calls Your Cell At 7:30am

It's never to tell you that you are awesome.

During my commute this morning, my cell phone started to ring. I looked down at the phone in my lap and saw the name of one of the firm's partners dubiously flash across the screen. My first thought was, "Oh Shit!"

Oh Shit! was I supposed to be at a meeting that I forgot about?

Oh Shit! did he just read my draft motion and think it was the equivalent of what would come out of Satan's ass if Satan ate a bucket of magnet alphabet letters?

Oh Shit! does he have a last minute project that he wants me to finish in an hour?

Oh Shit! did he actually mean to call his Great-Aunt Cee? (and, btw, who has Great-Aunts anymore?)

Let's get one thing clear, I was not thinking happy thoughts when I saw his name. And when I heard the tone of his voice, my gut went the way of old lady boobs and dropped straight down to my knees.

"Cee..."
"Uh, hi. Hello Partner."
"I'm preparing for that deposition in the X matter. The one that you prepared the notice of deposition for. The one scheduled for 9am today."
"Yes..... [insert feeling of death]"
"I didn't reserve a conference room for this deposition, did you?"
.... phew.... is that all?......
"No I didn't...I will talk to the receptionist as soon as I get in."
"You didn't happen to schedule a court reporter did you?"
OH SHIT.
OH SHIT.
OH, HOLY MOTHER OF SHIT.
"Oh...ahem....no?"
"Shit." [my thoughts exactly.]

Maybe I'm too hard on myself. Maybe I always fear the worst. Maybe I tend to over-react. But the only thing I focused on during the rest of my commute was what kind of funeral my career might be having by the end of the day.

My imagination went wild and I expected to show up at work with all the partners and associations huddled by the front door, wearing scaldingly scolding expressions. 25 pairs of fingers pointing disapprovingly at me. Boxes full of my picture frames and office nick-nacks, waiting for me.

I began texting my husband like crazy, warning him of the impending doom and the fact that I might be a stay-at-home mom by lunchtime. I can't say that I didn't almost cry. How could I forget something so basic? Sure, I've never scheduled or prepared for a deposition before, but STILL. I should have figured it out. Did I think court reporters magically rained down from heaven?

That was seriously the longest commute of my life. Then I got to work and it was so anti-climactic. No one even cared. No one even knew. Everyone was going about their own business and had no clue about my huge guffaw. I even popped my head into Partner's office and all he said was, "can you get me a copy of X's medical records? Thanks."

And so Cee rides again. She lives to make another mistake. Stay tuned.

Billing In Odd Places

One of the best things about my job is that I can work practically anywhere. Unless I need to meet a client or discuss something with a partner, I can do my job at home, in a coffee shop or even beachside. All I really need is my computer and internet access. Sometimes I don't even need that!

Here are some odd places I've billed today:

1) While taking a shower this morning, inspiration suddenly struck. Mid-lather, I basically drafted a letter to opposing counsel in response to a letter he sent me the day before. So, that would be .1 for preparation of correspondence to opposing counsel....while lathering my hair!

2) When I arrived at the ferry station I realized that they had switched out our usualy ferry boat for an older boat, one without an outlet. Ugh, if only I would have known, I would have charged my laptop. I circled the boat but the only outlet I could find was in the women's bathroom. Guess where I prepared my status report? The smell was less than inspiring though.

3) Later in the day I had to travel to a nearby city to do a privilege review of our client's documents. When we travel for work we get to add that in to the amout of time it takes us to complete the billable task. So I happily rolled down the windows and bellowed along to the songs that played on my favorite country station, all the while billing some good, quality time. NICE!

My joy was interrupted, however, upon my return to the office. The second I stepped back into the office, I received a letter from opposing counsel stating that our answer to a complaint was overdue and warning of a pending default judgment. My heart skipped a beat for a second. Then I berated myself and wondered how I could miss such an important deadline. Of course, in my state you can defeat a default judgment by bringing your answer to the default judgment hearing but I didn't want to look bad in front of the partner!

Then I read the letter more carefully and looked up the civil rule only to discover that opposing counsel's argument is in direct conflict with the plain language of the civil rule. According to the civil rule, we had over 30 more days to file our answer. Um, seriously? Did he even read the rule? In response, I sent him a one paragraph letter re-stating the local rule word for word- with relevant portion bolded, of course. I really, really wanted to end the letter by saying, "EAT THAT!"*

But I refrained.


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* This reminds me of one of my favorite lawschool professor's rants. Essentially he lectured to his 1Ls that students and attorneys need to read statutes really carefully. His quotable from that lecture was, "learn to read statutes, or else your children will not go to college."

Office Decor

My office badly needs a make-over.

The walls are bare with the exception of two nails poking out indicating where the old inhabitant hung his diplomas.

My desk is ugly. Butt ugly. It's a very light, yellowish fake oak color. And it's almost sparkly in the sunlight.

There are stacks of paper everywhere. I've been so busy billing that I've only had time to organize my case files into stacks of paper lined up across my desk, bookshelf and windowsill. Yes, it's pretty bad.

But at least I have my shoes in order. (see that white envelope to the left of my Frye boots? That's my law school diploma. Nice place for it huh?)

I've decided that my office needs this:


(a Fathead wall cling of a fireplace)

What do ya think?

Too Crazy To Blog

This week in one word: CRAZY.

I've basically been working every waking hour since Sunday. I'm crabby. Tired. Stressed. And I feel like I've been dropping the ball all over the place.

The source of most of my craziness is a case that I am helping on been helping that is scheduled for trial in a week. This case has basically taken all of my energy and mental thought. And I've only been in charge of certain assignments so I really feel for the associate handling the case. This week I finished up some motions in limine- which were filed today with a bazillion exhibits. It felt SO GOOD to see those go out the door and know that I won't have to work on them again- until our reply is due. However, at the last minute today I was reminded that we needed a declaration in support of the motions. OMG. I had totally forgotten about those..... There went the first half of my day.

Last night I started woring on special verdict forms for all the claims and parties involved. That was a crazy experience. It reminded me of a "Choose your own adventure" book. I think I still have a headache from those.

TONIGHT I have to work on the Trial Brief which I haven't started and which I have to turn into the partner by end of day tomorrow. In other words, I won't be sleeping tonight.

Wednesday I gave an in-house CLE to the attorneys at our firm. The topic I chose to present on was service of process with regards to foreign and out of state defendants. It was an hour long CLE but I put a total of 10 hours preparing for it. Thank goodness I get CLE credit for all of that time. I think next time around I will chose a topic that is (1) easier and (2) more thrilling. At least no one fell asleep....although I swear one attorney was sleeping with his eyes open.

I had to do all the above in addition to keeping up on my other cases-- which involved preparing and filing a 12(B)(6) motion to dismiss, drafting interrogatories and answering a complaint.

All in all, I am in serious need of a vacation. But, at this point, I'd settle for a full night's sleep (I'm averaging 4-5 hours of sleep per night this week). I wish I could look forward to the weekend but I'll be preparing an outline for an upcoming deposition and drafting another motion to dismiss instead of enjoying the weather. Seriously- who knew law was so much work?

It's Wednesday And I Still Need A Drink

My cases continue to explode on me. I swear that there was an urgent task on each one of my cases today (I have 7 of my own cases and I'm assisting on an additional 3 cases- that's alot of urgent tasks). While the stress level is pretty high, I ABSOLUTELY love being overwhelmed and knee deep in litigation. At the very least, it's better than the alternative.

I've responded to and initiated enough phone calls and emails today to make anyone crazy. Seriously, by the end of the day I counted up over 19 tasks that I billed as a .1 which related to some form of communication with a client, opposing counsel, expert or other third party.

Oh and I had over an hour long phone conference with one of my clients who doesn't speak English. And the interpreter in on the call didn't help much. She had such a thick accent that I almost couldn't tell when she was speaking English to me or the foreign language. Do you understand how hard it is to explain Washington law to a newly arrived foreigner with no knowledge about our legal system, especially when everything being said is filtered through a third party interpreter!? It's especially hard when they are the defendant and have no idea why they are being sued. That phone call was definately the most challenging hour of my day.

I can't even believe there was a time when my work load was light. I think my current work "to-do" list contains enough billable hours to last me for a whole month. But aside from the craziness, things keep getting better. I'm finally growing into my position. I feel a sense of confidence in my role as an attorney. I'm giving recommendations to clients and to the partners.

BUT most importantly of all, I HAVE BUSINESS CARDS!

This is so much fun!

Oh and did I mention that I left my office tonight at 8pm? Yeah, where's that drink?!

Jury Trials & Tribulations

Our firm has a monster of a trial coming up ... and I was enlisted to help! When I say monster, I do mean monster. There is one plaintiff, who in essence represents over 80 people, four defendants and four third party defendants. As the defendants we get to defend claims against the Plaintiff as well as pursue claims against the third party defendants. Plus, this case involves 10 causes of action, none of which have been settled by motion or summary judgment. It's pretty exciting around here!

So Partner sends me an email asking for my assistance in preparing for trial. Then Associate walks into my office:

Associate: "Hey, did you get Partner's email? Do you know what you need to help with?"
Me: "Yes, I got it right here. Prepare jury instructions and.... motions in lime?"
Associate: "Um, you mean 'motions in limine.' Do you think you can handle those? I'll give you all the prior status reports and pleadings that you will need."
Me: "Sure, no problem. Actually, I'm pretty excited."
Associate: "Good."

Associate walks out of my office. I take a big breath, turn to my computer screen and immediately google "motions in limine." This is the epitome of being thrown into practice. You get to work on assignments you never knew existed with names you can barely pronounce. Like voir dire....who the hell came up with that term?

Then there's the jury instructions. The first ten jury instructions were kind of fun. You have to establish the elements and burdens of proof for each claim and try to present them in a coherent fashion to the jury. Except the pattern jury instructions are dripping with legalese. I re-read them and kept thinking to myself- really? I barely understand this definition of proximate cause and I went to lawschool. You're going to pull 12 random people off the street and talk to them about superceding causes unbroken by a direct chain of sequential events? Good luck with that. I might as well write all these jury instructions in Chinese. The jury can just decide which party is correct by which witnesses have the most realistic looking toupes.

Also, I have a beef with exhibit lists. Can someone please explain to me why I have to review an "exhibit list" containing 997 exhibits? Seriously? My poor brain can't handle it all. Why do we even need exhibits? I mean people swear to tell the truth (the whole truth and nothin' but the truth) anyway, right (ha ha)?

After I'm done with all that, I get to work on voir dire questions and a trial brief. Cool huh? Actually, I have no idea because I have never seen a single set of voir dire questions and I have no idea what a trial brief is! Let the fun begin!

The crazy thing is that most cases never get this close to trial. Many lawyers never really get a chance to do trial prep work. I should feel lucky that I get some of this experience so early on in my career. But I can't help but be amazed at how much of the trial prep for this high stakes case is being done by lawyers who have no idea what they are doing (me!). Then I reemember, in the field of law, you never have all the answers.

27 Banker Boxes Full Of Hell

Work has been crazy this week. I have a million things due and not enough time to complete them all! From Monday to Thursday, I billed over 34 hours. That might not seem impressive to some people but that's usually my weekly goal to reach my 155 billable hours per month. And that time is in addition to a 1 hour work lunch, a 1 hour work function and a 2 hour in-house CLE. To put it lightly, I'm kind of exhausted.

And guess what I get to do today? Resume document review of 27 banker boxes full of construction documents! I started this task yesterday and I only got through about 8 boxes for the entire day. In total, I reviewed 4 years worth of construction meeting minutes, 2 years worth of change orders, and god-only-knows how much random correspondence. UGH. 19 more boxes of awesomeness to go. Opposing counsel did their review of these boxes in one day- with 6 people helping out. I get to do it in 2 days, by myself. YAY! (not).

So, you know what's not so awesome about finally having a bar number? Opposing counsel gets to see how new your bar number is and try to take advantage of you. It's pretty much a lovely walk in the park with a rainbow sno-cone....

Weeks ago I was tasked with scheduling this awesome document review project with opposing counsel. The documents are at a third party counsel's office (this party already settled out of the case). After working with everyone and their important schedules, I finally got a week set aside for the doc review. Weeks later and one day before opposing counsel is supposed to review the files (it just worked out that they were scheduled to review first) a partner from opposing counsel's office calls me up all frantic-like. He claims he wasn't involved in the whole scheduling process and begged me to switch days with opposing counsel.

I was a little bit excited to have a partner from opposing counsel's office call me. See, I'm IMPORTANT now. I have a BAR NUMBER. (insert head inflate). So I decided to be nice and accomodate him. This is what that complying with the "spirit of discovery" is all about right? So I agree to switch days and we both left the conversation satisfied. However, I did think it was odd that instead of just rescheduling his day for review he specifically asked me if I would take his day so he could take my day.

I pop into Partner's office to let him know about the schedule change. Partner looks at me and asks, "did he say why he couldn't go tomorrow?" I reply, "No, he just told me he had a conflict and asked if I could go first." Then Partner looks at me again and with this wise old expression on his face (except he's not really old and, in fact, he's kid of hot- in a partner-sort-of-way) he says, "I think he wanted you to go first so he could copy all the documents you flagged."

That's when it all made sense. DUH. Why else wouldn't he just reschedule with the third party who has the documents? Why else would he make a specific effort to call me and request to switch days? on the phone he was so pleasant and I thought I was doing him a major favor. But to find out that he was swindling me the whole time- UGH! I feel so burned!

So what did Partner and I decide to do? We called third party with the documents, and rescheduled our review for later in the week (to be honest, we weren't prepared to view the documents one day early because we were waiting for a phone call from our client regarding what we should be looking for). Small victories are important in the practice of law. Especially when you are staring into the heart of a mountainous pile of banker boxes awaiting your review.

5 Little Numbers

Cee has a bar number! I've been checking my State's bar association website every five minutes for the past two weeks hoping that the State Supreme Court got my application and that everything went through. It feels so weird to actually see my name there with my very own bar number. I shrieked like a little girl (or big girl) at a Hannah Montana concert and then immediately memorized my bar number (I get excited about the little things ok?!).

I feel so official! I never knew five little numbers could have such an effect! I almost feel like a different person. Later in the afternoon, I had to make several calls about a discovery issue. When I introduced myself over the phone, I made a very special effort to mention that I was an attorney working for Firm X as opposing to just "Cee from Firm X."

I've only been an admitted attorney for one day and my head has already doubled in size.

Tomorrow I get to sign my very first pleading which will be an Answer in a small claim personal injury lawsuit. I think this is a worthy occasion to bust out my talking Napolean Dynamite pen.

More On The Billable Hour

Thanks for all your comments. I just have a couple more things to say about this topic though. First, I need to clarify that I work in insurance defense. Billable hours are hard at any firm, but when your clients are insurance companies, billable hours are an exceptional pain in the ass. You all know the reputation of insurance companies when it comes to handling claims... "deny, deny, deny." (side note: I think insurance companies might actually be hated more than attorneys, not quite sure though). Well, they have the same mentality when it comes to paying their attorneys.

Our clients are VERY strict about what bills they will pay. I have to word my billing entries just perfectly if I want them to be accepted as a legitimate billing task. It's a steep learning curve. And we get audited quite often- just think of the billable hours I lose from reviewing my time entries, correcting my audited entries and appealing their denial of my time entries.

I think you all are right that generally, associates should not be cutting their own time. In general, I don't do this unless a partner specifically tells me I can't bill more than X hours for a certain task. For example: one partner wanted me to put together a checklist and memo about how to subpoena non-parties. He told me this was not billable. When I had to put together a subpoena, he instructed me that whenever he's the partner on the case, a task like this cannot be billed at more than a .1. Yeah, that's 6 minutes for something that took me 30 minutes to do. This problem doesn't come up very often though and I know as I do more of these things I will become more efficient. (For the person who asked about stipulations: we generally will see if the other side will stipulate to provide records. If they won't, then we will subpoena the records from the party who maintains them. In my experience, plaintiffs will usually stipulate to authorize the release of medical records unless they have prior injuries and want to keep them from being discovered.)

Another billing problem is purely the result of me being at the bottom of the totem pole. When there are non-billable, non-client related marketing projects, those tasks generally will fall on me until the firm hires someone who is greener than I am.

So I know this billable hour thing will get easier when I become more experienced and when the non-billable work gets handed down to someone else. The problem is that I'm a semi-perfectionists. If there is a guideline or a bar set, I like to exceed it as much as possible. Not meetng my weekly/monthly billable hour requirement is killing me. I feel like a bad associate. I know the firm will cut me some slack for a while but it personally irks me that I can't meet the goal. I survived law school so you'd think I'd be used to being just mediocre or just passing by now. But I'm not. The inner perfectionist in me still lives.

I want to beat the billable hour. I will beat the billable hour. I just need to find the motivation. Or I need to block all access to the internet/my phone/tv/cooking magazines/my child. Yeah, that might work.

Unmotivated: The Billable Hour Is Winning

I'm so unmotivated lately, which is odd because this unmotivation comes at a time where I am finally getting a slew of my own cases and my work load is picking up.

I think my unmotivation stems from the little monster I call the Billable Hour (Bill for short).

I am obviously behind schedule when it comes to meeting my year end billable hour requirement. I know I have the entire year to make this up, (I'm hoping for a string of crazy depositions across the state, this would equate to billable hour heaven). At the end of each month, the partners circulate a table which shows how many hours each associate has billed and how far they are above or behind target. I dread this each month. Not only do I have to face how behind I am, but every other associate in the office gets to know about my daily struggle with Bill.

When I was a summer associate, I easily billed 8 hours a day. Easy Peasy. This is because people handed me assignments and all I had to do was what I was instructed to do. But now that I'm an associate, I have to spent time thinking about my cases and trying to figure out what to do next. I have to learn everything from scratch as I go. For example, no matter how new you are, it's not acceptable to bill an hour for preparing a simple stipulation for the release of medical records, even if your first one legitimately takes you that long. And I'm still trying to build my reputation in the firm so something as small as asking a partner a question takes me an unusual amount of prep time. I don't want to sound stupid, I want to know all the facts and issues and I want to rehearse what I'm going to say. I can't bill for stuff like this but it seems to suck the hours out of my day.

My first couple months were slow but I was rearing to go. Now I have a lot of work but I can't find the motivation. When I think about how far behind I am I become freakishly intimidated. It's like staring into the deep blue belly of the Puget Sound, trying to get the inspiration to jump into the cold water. I have every intention of sitting at my desk until all my hours are billed (at least for just the day) but I keep stalling or finding excuses (another cup of coffee, errand during lunch, grabbing a quick lunch, and then when I get home I think "oh I'm tired, I'll bill those hours tomorrow). And Bill keeps growing bigger and meaner. Welcome to my Catch-22.

I think I need to refocus and regroup. I mean, my upcoming tasks are actually pretty interesting. I should be excited to do them. I just need to stop worrying about the Billable hour and how far behind I am an just focus on the tasks I need to accomplish. Easier said than done. I also need to build better working habits (such as do a task right away instead of putting it on a steadily growing to-do list), work more efficiently and figure out how to cut out unnecessary distractions.

Finally, I need to find some motivation. I know it's here somewhere. Is it under my desk, nope just 5 pairs of shoes under there (including one pair of Frye boots- don't ask). Is it in my drawer, nope just three king-sized Hershey bars. Oh well, I'll find it....eventually...in fact, I'll put that on my to-do list: "find motivation." Maybe I can get around to that next week.

The Mondayest Monday

This week I had the Monday of all Mondays. And it was actually a Tuesday.

Thanks to the long Memorial Day weekend, Tuesday was my Monday. And yes, my billable hours are going to suffer for that. But let's not think about that right now.

When we got home from the coast, instead of finding a happy envelope containing my bar card waiting for me, I found a sad, wrinkled, wet and waterstained envelope containing my returned bar application. I'm not even sure why the post office returned it. It had nothing on it telling me what was wrong with it! I was so mad! This was the second time it had been returned to me (the first time, I didn't put enough postage).

So on my Tuesday-Monday I decided to hand deliver my application on my way to the office. After scouring the block where the bar association was supposed to be and walking into wrong buildings for like 10 minutes, I found the bar association across the street, marked clearly by a sign with big bold letters. Ooops. Dur.

I crossed the street and walked into the building. Then I got into the wrong set of elevators and ended up on an entirely wrong floor. I finally made my way back to the lobby where I eventually found the elevator that would take me to the correct floor. I marched proudly into the bar association office in my slacks and sneakers and then, not so proudly, handed over my still-wet and water stained bar application.

When I handed the receptionist my application, I couldn't for the life of me remember the word for "wet." I looked at her and said, "Sorry my application is..... uh.... watery." She looked across the table at the weird girl in green sneakers (that would be me) and probably mistook me for a legal messenger (but at least I didn't smell like one- man why do they all stink? And what's up with their weird bags?).

I finally made it to my office after stopping at Starbucks and spilling coffee down my pants. I plopped down in my office chair and not one second later an associate storms in and (frantically) asks, "Hey, can I see your appendix? Where's your appendix?"

What? I stared at him blankly for a second trying to process his statement. "You want to see my appendix? You mean like this one?" I point to my abdomen where I believe my appendix to be. He looks at me all crazy like then roars a horrendous laugh out of the gaping hole in his contorted face. "No wierdo. I need to see the appendix to your motion for reconsideration because I'm preparing one too and I want to see what yours looks like."

Oh yeah. THAT APPENDIX! Me = laughing stock of the 22nd floor office suite.

So that was my Non-Monday Monday. Phew.

Oh yeah, this is the icing on the cake: at one point in the day I was on a semi-important phone call with one of our experts. We started to discuss the case and the science that would support our position on a liability issue. He starts to say something really important but I can't find a pen to jot the information down. I have the phone tucked between my ear and my shoulder and I'm using two hands to surf around the top of the desk, pushing stacks of paper everywhich way to locate that DANG PEN. I give up and open my "pen" drawer where I find one blue, one red and one green CRAYON. Don't ask why I have crayons in my desk.

So yes, I took down a super important note with a flashy blue crayon. I couldn't help smiling from ear to ear each time I pressed the blue tip to my notepad. In fact, I think I should use crayon more often....I wonder what the partners would think if I handed them a note in blue crayon?

The Price Of Advice

Being a baby lawyer is all kinds of fun. You can (well, sometimes) rely on the fact that you are new to this whole "law" thing and people will (sometimes) cut you a little slack. Like, hypothetically, if you were to draft a proposed order to accompany one of your motions but you create a signature line for the partner where the Judge's signature line is supposed to be. And the partner signs it without double checking your work. Then the Judge uses your proposed order, which the partner has already signed for her, and the partner ends up looking like (1) a really big, careless idiot or (2) a pompous ass. Then to rub salt in the wound, opposing counsel emails all counsel on the case to make fun of the partner. Wouldn't that (hypothetically) be horrifying? At least a partner just might overlook this mistake if it was made by a newbie lawyer (please?).

But the best part about being a baby lawyer is the misadventures of asking for advice. Asking coworkers for advice is probably the thing you will do most often in your career. (The only way to avoid this is if you did NOT fall asleep every day in civil procedure, you had a really good civil procedure professor AND you are a super genius who has memorized every civil procedure case you have ever read before conveniently cataloguing it and storing it away in the file cabinet in your brain). My point is, asking for advice is unavoidable.

The first thing you will realize when you are a new lawyer is that there are BAD people to ask for advice and GOOD people to ask for advice. The second thing you will realize is that all advice, though freely given, comes at a price. On any given day, all you can do is decide what kind of price you are in the mood to pay. My firm sometimes seems like a showcase of attorneys who are too smart for their own good. When this is coupled with the fact that most lawyers generally feel underappreciated and unrecognized, a newbie seeking advice will inevitably and obliviously run headlong into the Perfect Storm.

The following people, who I somehow ALWAyS end up asking for advice, are perfect examples.

Me: "Can I ask you a quick question?"
Associate I Can't Believe You Don't Know: (looking smug and pompous) "Okay."
Me: "Under set of facts x,y,z, should I worry about the defense of improper venue?"
Associate: "Wait, really? You don't know this? I'm a little worried. Didn't you take civil procedure?"
Me: "Yes. And I know there probably isn't an issue here but since this is my first case, I just wanted to double check and run it by someone else."
Associate: "That set of facts has NOTHING to do with venue. Seriously?"
Me: "Ok thanks. I just wanted to make sure. Thanks again."
Associate: "Improper venue involves ..... goes on to provide a full civ pro lecture but strategicallly pauses his "lecture" to let me fill in the blanks aloud like I'm a five year old"

Then there's the really smart person who for sure knows the answer but never fails to go all Socratic Method on you.
Me: "Do you have a quick second?"
Associate Socrates: "Sure."
Me: "I'm working on a subpoena to a non-party in this case and I just wanted to make sure I'm doing everything I need to do. So to give notice do I need....
Associate Socrates: "What does the rule say?"
Me: "Well, from what I remember, the rule says....
Associate Socrates: "Here is my rule book. Go ahead. Recite the rule outloud."
Me: "Ok, it says to serve notice on a party according to rule 5(c). Isn't that just sending a copy to the party's attorney?"
Associate Socrates: "What does rule 5(c) say?"
Me: "I'll look it up.... but, also, how much time do you like to give the non-party to comply with the subpoena?"
Associate Socrates: "What does the rule require?"
Me: "Yeah, I'll go look it up. Thanks." (NOT!)

Then there is the overhelpful Associate.
Me: "Wow, I'm working on this tricky case involving insurance coverage in a UIM case. Have you dealt with this issue recently?"
Overhelpful: "Oh actually, 20 years ago, when I was in lawschool, I wrote a law review article on that issue. Here, I'll send you my article. Oh and also, there's this blog that gives some good advice too, I'll send you the link.
Me: "Gee, that's great. Thank you."
Overhelpful: "One time, I had a UIM case that involved a phantom vehicle. Be careful if you have a phantom vehicle, the plaintiff has to provide all kinds of special documents."
Me: "Ok. thanks. I'll remember that if I ever encounter that."
Overhelpful: "The statute requires the plaintif to ...(goes on and on). But before you even get that far, the plaintiff has some initial burdens of proof. So you want to watch out for that. Oh I jsut remembered another article I can send you. It's written by this really amazing professor.
Me: "Well, actualy I think I have all I need now..."
Overhelpful: "In my case, we had to find a special expert to... (goes on and on). Oh and make sure you look at this statute too. You'll also want to....."

Ten minutes later, I'm back in my office when I suddenly get a call from....Mr. Overhelpful. Guess what? He has even more irrelevant advice!

While dealing with overhelpful and underhelpful advice givers may be a pain in the butt, it's usually unavoidable when you're a first year associate (and perhaps for the rest of your legal career). So be cautious before you decide who you are going to approach. It depends.... Do you want to feel like a five year old, do you want to feel like you're back in lawschool being walked through the nuances of the law by a tiresome professor or do you want your ears to melt off the sdie of your face from an overabundance of irrelevant information?

Whatever you do, CHOOSE WISELY.

The "Job Market Sucks And I Don't Know What I'm Doing" Syndrome

I'm paranoid. Each time my phone rings, each time I see a new email in my inbox, each time a partner pops his head into my office, I think I'm being fired.

I attribute my constant fear for my job to the deadly combo of knowing there are very few jobs out there, living through the current recession and feeling constantly inadequate. I love my job. I LOVE it. But sometimes I feel like I don't deserve it. I feel like I'm such a drag on the firm because I require constant hand holding. I make a lot of mistakes and I can barely, if ever, meet my billable hours. I feel like there is a job axe murderer out to get me. And anyminute, my career is going to be hacked to pieces. A part of me thinks that I only feel this way because all the partners seem constantly busy and stressed out lately. They all seemed stretched to capacity. As a result, there is little room for my error and even less room to stop and ask them for guidance.

The looming feeling that disaster is around each corner is grating on my nerves. It's this constant sickness that silently eats away at my confidence and my gut. I feel unworthy. And I can't help but think that any minute my bosses will also realize this fact. Then I worry about what will happen if I do lose my job. I could never get another job in this market, not without more experience. I'd have to go into laon forebearance again. I'd have to sell all my clothes to feed my kid (oh tragedy! Not the Frye boots!)- ok, it's not THAT drastic, my husband has a very stable job- but I'm a worry wort. It's what I do.

I've come to accept that all I can do is my best. I have to hold my head up and just focus on the tasks right in front of me. I have to hope that the partners will not focus on my inadequacies and my mistakes but, rather, see me for my dedication, hard work, and passion for litigation. I have to convince myself that this paranoia is all in my head. One good thing about this paranoia is that it sure as heck makes me appreciate my job.

Most importantly, I have to realize that I, just as much as anyonelse, deserve my chance to grow into my new role. At one point in time, all superstar lawyers were in the very position that I am currently in. After all my hard work in lawschool, as a summer associate, and studying for the bar, at the very least, I deserve a chance to prove myself, right?

Today especially, I needed a little extra boost. So, when picking out my outfit for work today (which, thankfully happened to be casual day), I donned on my "power piece." A power piece is that one piece of clothing that makes you feel completely unstoppable and confident. It lets you be you, without apology or reservation. Ok, some of you may just cringe at this next part because...my power piece is..... my cowgirl boots! Yup, cowgirl boots at the office! I wore them with my Paige jeans, matching leather belt with fancy beltbuckle and a fitted button up shirt from Banana Republic. In spite of the curious sidelong glances from people in the elevator, I felt totally awesome all day long. I felt like I could kick major butt! It jsut about canceled out all my career fears and paranoias.

You know what? There is nothing better in the world than to feel comfortable in your skin, without any reserve, knowing your outward self reflects your inner self. (I may have just met my weekly philosophical quota).

Swearing In Court

Wednesday was my swear-in ceremony. I originally had my heart set on being sworn in at the fancy downtown seattle courthouse with its marble floors and walls and all its prestige. But considering that my family wanted to attend and that, like me, they live across the water from Seattle, I opted to be sworn in at the small, local courthouse.

Turns out, I'm so glad I did!

I live in such a close-knit, friendly community. My husband and I used to work for a local government agency so we know many of the elected officials and other connected people. It's a great feeling to know the people around you and to feel connected to your community. While I hear the community of legal professionals seems small almost anywhere you go, it is especially so in our county. When I decided to be sworn-in at the local courthouse, I asked my old employer, the first partner I ever worked for, if he knew anyone who would be willing to perform (is that the right verb?) my oath. He suggested a judge right away and arranged the whole thing. It turns out that the judge knew my mom from highschool. The judge was also friends with my dad's boss, the Mayor of our city. So the Mayor asked to attend my ceremony. Can you believe it? The Mayor of my city attended my swear-in ceremony! I felt so important!

Also in attendance were my parents, my brother, my parents-in law, my sister-in law and her family, my husband, son, my old boss and his paralegal and legal secretary. It was quite the turn out, especially for an individual ceremony. I was pretty nervous to appear in front of the judge and take my oath, especially since I was the only one taking it. When the Judge started to read the oath and asked me repeat after her, I thought it would be tacky to just read off the paper in front of me. So, instead, I tried to keep my eyes on the Judge and rely on my auditory skills and memory to recite after her. This worked out fine until about halfway through when the Judge started to recite a phrase that seemed to continue on forever. "Oh shit," I thought to myself as she was mid-sentence. When she finished, I'm sure she saw the fear in my eyes as I had to scour the paper in front of me to try to find that last sentence.

After an awkward minute of silence, I finally found it and tried to repeat it back with all the confidence I could muster. But my nerves were already shot. As I tried to pronounce the word "judiciary" my whole mouth seemed to go numb and my lips fumbled over each other. I just couldn't pronounce the word. Instead I recited, "Dujici...jiducia...judiciary!" My guests got a good chuckle out of that one.

Awesome. My first appearance before the court as an attorney and I almost turned it into a circus. But the Judge was kind enough to pretend that it didn't happen. And I have to say that I felt the power behind the words when I swore to uphold the Constitution of the State of Washington and of the United States.

After the oath, the Judge let my parents give speeches (on the record! I have proof that people said nice things about me). She let me give a mini-speech, which I was totally unprepared for. I ended up thanking everyone in the room except for my husband (sorry husband!). She noticed and let my husband have the final words, but he was too choked up and teary eyed that he couldn't say too much. It was really sweet and, it turns out, his hug said everything.

The Judge then came down to where I was standing to shake my hand. She had all kinds of pleasant and friendly things to say to me. She was the nicest person ever! She told me the legal profession was one of the best and most challenging professions out there. She encouraged me and congratulated me on my future career. Then my old boss made a joke about how he hopes to someday convince me to practice law on the "right" side of the water (my own town rather than Seattle).

It was such a great morning! I usually hate being the center of attention but I felt that this was the pinnacle of all my hard work and sacrifice. For the first time, I actually saw and felt the result of all my efforts over the past 3.5 years. But one of THE BEST PARTS of the entire morning was when the Judge let me take pictures of Jacob sitting in her chair. Here he is banging her gavel (this picture is so going to be framed and put in my office!):

(Please don't judge me that my son still uses a binky! We're trying to wean him off but it's too easy to stick it in his mouth when he starts to scream.)

Case Management Is Not My Friend

I kind of miss my days of summer associateship. Those were the golden days. More than decent pay, my own office, interesting and diverse projects and, best of all, no responsibility. Partners and associates would hand me random little projects on very specific issues in different cases. I'd complete my projects between the hours of 9 to 5 and then go home for the day, worry free, oblivious and happy.

Being an associate is a WHOLE 'nother story! I have cases. Real, actual cases. And clients. Living, breathing clients. Clients with real issue whose interests and bank accounts are at stake. The clients have all kinds of questions too. Unique and complex questions. And, most likely, I have no answers- only recommendations- and the recommendations I give cause me to think in beffudled, circular riddles and second guess my interpretation of the law.

The more experience I gain in the field of law, the more I realize that it's not about ANSWERS. Because there never ARE answers. It's about coming up with recommendations that have the most likely chance of success and crafting arguments that are most likely to pursuade a judge or jury. The law is a big open battle-field and laywers are left to run amok, punching and kicking each other over ambiguous caselaw.

But that's not even the hard part. The hardest part about practicing law is case management. When I was a summer associate, I just had to do the projects as I was instructed and I left all the big thinking to others. Now, I have to manage my cases: make sure all deadlines are met, all motions are responded to, all due diligence has been conducted, all court rules are followed, and craft and carry out strategic plans of attack. It's crazy and confusing and I have no choice but to learn through trial and error as I go. Saying it's stressful doesn't quite describe it.

I have a hard time remembering where I am in each case as I go back and forth handling the issues that pop up in each of my cases. I get all my file numbers, the facts, client information and litigation history mixed up. I'll be knee deep in a motion or report on one case when a partner will shoot me an email asking me the status of X of my other case or asking if I've done Y yet in yet another case. I have several "Oh shit" moments each day. And.... I only have FIVE cases! Seriously. The average number of cases per associate in my firm is like 15 (some even have 21).

I feel a little bit doomed. BUT I feel like I'm learning at an exponential rate each day. I mean when you know little about litigation and then get thrown into a number of cases, all you can do is learn as you go. And I'm learning. Boy, am I learning! If only I would learn in three years of law school what I learn in ONE DAY of practicing law.

Welcome! Now Pay Up Suckers.

Congratulations on passing the bar! To be admitted, please complete the new admittee licensing form along with your payment in full of the following:

Licensing Fee
Lawyer's Fund For Client Protection
Local Bar Membership Fee
Supreme Court Wall Certificate Fee

Wow. Seriously? Why didn't someone warn me that the legal profession was a really bad night club with strict entry requirements and a hefty cover charge? I've already shelled out over $600 to take the bar exam and another $115 to register my computer for use during the exam. Not to mention the $3,000 I paid for Barbri and my $120,000 legal education.

People in my profession sure are good at squeezing money out of other people.

No wonder there is such an income disparity in our country. It really is true that you have to have money to make money. Good thing I didn't buy my truck because it is seriously going to take my downpayment to just be admitted into the practice of law.

Ear Candy!

I have the lamest project at work this week. I'm analyzing over 1,400 pages of attorney time entries from opposing counsel so that we can argue why their fees and costs are excessive an unnecessary. Yay for me.

There is a silver lining to this eyeball burning, headache inducing lameness, however. Today I called co-counsel about a question I had with the time entries. I dialed up his direct number. That's when the sexiest, deepest voice, with a hint of southern drawl, answered the phone. My pants almost melted off right there in my office. The voice that came over the phone was funny and nice and was laced with quirky idioms.

This is what he had to say about opposing counsel: "If dumb was dirt, he'd cover half an acre." and "two sandwiches short of a picnic."

Can you have a crush on a voice? Can you have a crush on someone you've never even seen? About an hour later, I was still thinking about that voice. So I called him back and asked him a question I knew the answer to just so I could hear him again (speak of unnecessary attorney fees)!

How much you want to bet that he's an old man with no teeth and a mullet?

For Love Of Law

I love my job. Lots. Actually, I think it's crazy how much I love my job. I love my job. I love my own office. I love my co-workers. I love my bosses. I love my clients- from all walks of life and ends of the spectrum. I mean, I REALLY love my job. That's not normal right?

I still am amazed at how my quixotic, wandering and spontaneous soul ended up in a professional career with an admirable education and a legitimate job. I remember the tortures and the worries and the hauntings I felt about becoming a lawyer. I thought it wouldn't be for me. I thought I'd never be smart enough to succeed in the legal profession. I thought my chances were slim for landing a job, especially next to my impressive law review peers. And yet, here I am. I have an associate position in a successful (although smaller) law firm with some pretty impressive (ok not like majorly impressive, but impressive to me) clients. I receive praises for my work (most of the time) and the other associates and partners show their appreciation for all the projects I help out with.

I would never have believed in all my law school life that I would end up here. Happy, productive and on the top floor of a downtown Seattle skyrise. I thought I'd eventually graduate lawschool with misgivings. I swore I would end up lost among the legal profession, unsure of where I really belonged. I thought law school would lead me down a non-legal career path into governance or social administration. I wasn't logical or practical enough for a stuffy, paper-pushing office job. And yet. Here I am, soaking it up and loving it.

And now it all makes sense. Litigation is the perfect career path for me. I am super nerdy. I love to research. I love to learn things and be intellectual. I love to write papers. BUT I also like to be productive and see end results. Every time I get to write a motion, I satisy both of those parts of me. I get to write an argument for why something should happen and then I get to see that argument actually result in a Judge's Order and report back the end resuls to the client. It's PERFECT.

Also, litigation is awesome because, no matter how many years you practice law, you will ALWAYS come across a new issue that you've never seen before. Of course at this early stage in my career, everything is new. But it's refreshing to see that the experienced associates and partners don't know all the answers and it's kind of cool when they rely on your research and recommendations. Yesterday an associate asked me to write an opposition for a motion for expert deposition fees. Apparently, under discovery rules, if you request to take the deposition of opposing counsel's expert witness, you have to pay them for the time they spend "responding to discovery." But it's unclear whether this includes time they spend preparing for the deposition. At first, I thought this issue would be really boring- ew, fees and costs. YUK. But, it ended up being like a caselaw scavenger hunt to track down helpful cases from other jurisdictions and apply them to my case. Then applying that knowledge to a written final product that a JUDGE will read- it can't get any better for my nerdy self.

While I do love my job, it's not all 100% skittles and butterflies. I do find that my love for my job starts to dwindle by the time 5pm rolls around. And the nights that I am up until 1:30am finishing a "last minute, high priority" motion, I often rethink my career choice. But then I always wake up refreshed (or with a sleep deprivation hang-over, completely jacked up on caffeine) with a renewed sense of love.

And then there are paydays. Totally. Worth. Every. Late. Night.

Strippers And Sanctions

After work yesterday I went to a construction professionals meet and greet. There were mostly other construction defect lawyers in attendance. Laywers on both sides of the plaintiff/defendant fence and they all seemed to know each other. I spent a lot of time listening to other people talk about themselves. It was pretty lame. At events like this, I usually end up thinking that most attorneys are (1) old, (2) sleezy and (3) male. Maybe all the hot young professionals have better things to do on a Friday night.

Halfway through the evening another attorney joined the forray. He was loud and, quite clearly, drunk off his ass. He started talking about limos, strippers and cocaine. Nice. At this point in the evening I was the only woman in the room. Good thing I don't take offense easily, when you work in the legal profession, I don't think you really can. Also good thing I'm used to being "one of the guys."

During the discussion about stripper and cocaine, one of the other attorneys looks at me and says, "Sorry. This conversation is getting out of hand. Isn't it?"

I just looked at him and smiled, "It's ok. It takes a lot to offend me."

Then an attorney from my firm joins and says, "Yeah, take her out to lunch sometime and SHE'LL be the one offending YOU!" I think I turned bright red on the spot. But then I remembered the time I went to lunch with a group of attorneys from my firm. After one beer I was telling them all about the crush I have on my father-in-law and all the reasons why I could never be a stripper. Yeah, good times......

Anyway, the attorney that had just walked in starts introducing himself to someone next to me. His name sounds REALLY familiar. But I can't place it. Then the attorney from my firm says, "Cee, you have to meet this guy." He grabs my hand and takes me over to him and says, "Joe Bob, this is Cee. Cee this is Joe Bob. He's the guy that you got sanctioned."

Oh crap. THAT'S why his name sounds familiar! Remember that Motion to Dismiss that I wrote. The one where I claimed in my reply that they never responded timely when they actually DID? Well, it turns out the Judge granted our motion anyway and decided to sanction the other side a couple thousand dollars. And this was the guy from the other side.

Anyway so the guy at my firm introduces us and then "Joe Bob" just shrugs it off like it's no big deal. He's like, "I'm so filthy rich, I don't care. Maybe I deserved it." Then he continues right on talking about strippers and cocaine.

Gee, lawyers are such decent people.

Then I was bored out of my mind and ate about 53 chocolate covered strawberries.

The Daily Grind Is Not So Daily

Yesterday I put in my first 13+ hour day at the office. Yes, at the office. I didn't even just leave at the normal time and take my work home like I usually do. By the time 10:00pm rolled around and I started packing up, I was the last associate standing. I even met the nightly janitor. But I did turn red when he emptied my daily trash and only three hershey bar wrappers fell out. Oh and I discoverd to how to turn the lights back on after they automatically shut off. Adventures all around.

I wasn't 100% pleased when I caught my 10:30pm ferry. But you know what, that's ok considering how I felt in the morning.

Yesterday morning I arrived at work with a new case sitting on my desk, an responsive motion to draft, a few fires to put out and a partner asking me to research an interesting area of law. Last Friday I spent the majority of the day at a construction site warehouse sorting through dust boxes of documents. The day before that I made severall calls to a client in New Zealand and one in Canada. The day before that I was dealing an unexpected last minute surreply and with my MONSTROUS DISASTER (the topic of my previous post). Today I will probabaly be trying to figure out how to take the depositions of two people in California who are not parties to the action and do so on a shoe string budget.

Every day is different and I almost never can guarantee what the day will hold for me. This is why I not only NOT DREAD coming to work each day, but I actually LOOK FORWARD to it. My job is exciting and it changes all the time. In litigation, you never know what tactic the other side with throw at you, you have to dodge or extend discovery deadlines, and learn to navigate the court rules. You have to think through the issues and the facts to develop a case theory and plot out a plan of action.

Right now I am just so thrilled that I chose to pursue this messy and crazy world of law. I kind of just fell into my career in litigation but I'm pretty sure there is no other career I'd rather have.