Sunday, July 11, 2010

Kinda Trying

I wasn't sure if I really wanted to blog about this publicly but...oh well, why not. We're officially not preventing the addition of another person to our family. I'm really excited. Jacob just increases in his cuteness each day that we both are excited to see what our next kid will be like. (sidenote: I don't know what it is but there is something extra sexy about a man who wants to make a baby.)

It's really hard to be patient and wait for it to happen though. The last two months i've started to feel very ready and very anxious for another baby. I'm still terrified about a lot of things. Such as having another c-section considering that the last one was the most horrifying experience of my life. And the side effects of pregnancy while I'm working a demanding job. Oh, and more stretch marks, yuk....that might be as horrifying as another c-section.

So part of me is super anxious for it all to happen and the other part of me doesn't mind putting it off another couple months. I'm just worried that now that we are mentally ready for another one that it will take a long time. With Jacob, we stopped preventing pregnancy the day we got married... and we were pregnant the next month! I really hope that happens this time around so I don't have to go through the ups and downs, the hopefullness and the let down of waiting on that matching set of positive pink lines.

And super contracts (editor's note: that was totally supposed to say "congrats"- can you tell I've been working all weekend?) to Fumbling for Truth on her exciting news!


FSD said...

Good luck in your "kinda trying" attempts. We're "definitely trying". I could've written this post because I'm feeling all the inner turmoil you described. My heart tells me the time is right, but my mind takes over and casts doubt. When I was pregnant with Zoe work was super slow due to the recession. I think I billed about 1400 hours that year, most of which was before I was pregnant and in my 2nd trimester. I can't imagine going through my 1st trimester with my current workload, especially if I experience the type of fatigue I had with Zoe. Add the demands of raising a toddler....sigh. See, there goes my head again.

Anyway, good luck! It'll be fun to be pregnant "together."

Portia said...

Thanks Cee! And I can't wait to say "Contracts" to you too! :)

Yes, it is SO much more difficult to be pregnant at work that it was in school. But it is doable. It does make me thankful that we had Eden when we did - and I do love to be vindicated. :)

Best of luck - and happy babymaking!

Anonymous said...

Oh good luck :) Exciting news indeed!!!

Downsized Attorney said...

All this pregnant/trying talk makes me wonder when husband and I will finally think about having a kid.

je said...

Aw! Congrats! :) And I'm not gonna lie... I totally got jealous when I read this post.

PT LawMom said...

Good luck!!! In terms of productivity, my first trimester was so much better this time than with Pumpkinhead. It's getting worse but still a vast improvement over the complete brain fog I had with my last pregnancy. Unfortunately, sigh..., there are few ways to get around those 10 months of hell.