Saturday, August 30, 2008

Summer Is For Concerts

There were so many concerts I was dying to see this summer. For example, Jack "The Hot Talented Earth Friendly Surfer" Johnson. Last year, I just about died when Jack Johnson took time off from touring to be at home with his new baby because I had just missed his Seattle performance the year before. Now, thanks to the stubborn spawn of mine, my bad luck continues and I may NEVER see him perform live for AS LONG AS I LIVE.

Yes, this summer was a great one for concerts in the Seattle area. Too bad I had to miss them all because, you know, I was supposed to be HAVING A BABY!

I'm going to start tallying the concerts that I'm missing out on this summer so that I can hold it against Baby many years from now. Like when I want him to do the dishes. Or clean gunk out of the shower drain. Or eat the "experiment" I made for dinner using the only ingredients in the fridge: refried beans, carrots and mustard.

This summer I am missing:

Bumbershoot - Seattle's Annual Music Festival
Maroon 5
Boyz II Men
Jack Hotness Johnson

This kid soooo owes me, big time.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

World Peace? Maybe When Lawyers Rule The Country

I hate political parties. I don't want my political views categorized in a neat little box labeled "democrat" or "republican." These labels say little about what a person actually believes. What if the needs of our society change faster than the policies of either party? How can we make this country better if we disregard sound solutions just for the sake of maintaining a strong base of support from our designated "party."

I think we need political systems based upon logic. Not rhetoric or ideolody. While I am pro-life, I think it is important to put logic and reason above my own ideologies and religious beliefs when it comes to policy. We need to be rational about existing problems and possible solutions. This is one of the most important things I have learned at law school. Societal rules should be based on the greatest common denominator among the people. I could be wrong but it's my view that the ability to reason is that common denominator. Therefore, we should limit our discussion about policies to pure logical debate.

Having said that, I'm so excited about Obama/Biden. Both were educated as lawyers and both learned to think critically and analytically about problems. It's not necessarily WHAT they believe that I'm so excited about but the fact that I trust their judgment and ability to make sound logical and EDUCATED decisions. I think its about time we got more legal minds in positions of leadership. I trust that Obama and Biden will keep logic at the forefront of their decisions. I also have faith in the diplomatic skills of these two candidates- and diplomacy is something we really need in the international community right now.

I'm sure there are many people out there who think the LAST thing we need is two lawyers running the country :)

Baby Update

Things are looking up now! My doctor scheduled my induction. Hopefully, if all goes well, I will be meeting my baby boy on Tuesday!

I have to go into the hospital late Monday night to get all hooked up and "ripened" (ew, I hate that term). Then Tuesday morning they will break my water and start the drugs. My doctor said I will be holding my baby by dinner time! Of course there is a slight chance I could still go into labor before then but that is pretty unlikely according to my doctor.

My dad thinks its hilarious that my labor will be induced on labor day. I think its not so funny.

So I have four more days to kill but I think I'll survive. It feels so good knowing there is a definite end in sight. In fact, I kind of like knowing exactly when- down to the hour- I will have to be at the hospital. It's nice to be able to plan it all out and to mentally and emotionally gear up for the event.

September 2nd isn't a bad birthdate. In fact, I kind of like the sound of it. My baby will share the same birthday as Keanu Reeves, Salma Hayek and the United States Treasury Department.

I can't believe that I will be meeting my son in four short days! I have so much resting, sleeping, and t.v. watching to do!

Oh and thank you all for your kind supportive comments!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Prepartum Depression

Is there such a thing? I think I have it.

This is the third day in a row that I have absolutely no appetite. I force fed myself toast last night because I knew I had to eat something. Then I sat on my couch and stared at the wall for three hours. I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted from waiting. If I knew it would take so long I would have saved my mental energy but I expected to be done with this awful journey called pregnancy by now.

I'm sick of thinking about babies and hospitals. I know it sounds really awful but I can't stand anything baby related right now. I want to be myself again. And I'm even starting to wish I never got pregnant in the first place. The longer I sit on my butt waiting, the more time I have to think about what it means to bring a life into the world. That's more time to feel daunted by the 18 year commitment. More time to dwell on the fact that someone will call me "mom."

Worst of all, this waiting is creating a tremendous build-up. Before, I was so sick of being pregnant that I just wanted to go into labor right away. But now I have moments where I think about it too long and realize- "Holy shit. My body has to do THAT?!" And I feel trapped and scared and I can't just get it over with whenever a moment of courage passes over me.

I have no desire to do anything and this just makes me more bored and depressed. I don't want to go out because I'm sick of people asking when I'm due. Plus I feel even bigger than before and I don't have ANY shirts that fit and I'm sick of people staring at my belly! I'm so uncomfortable and even simple things- like bending over or getting off the couch- take a lot of effort and energy and maneuvering.

This depression is pretty bad. I know it's bad because I don't even want to eat ice cream.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Proof That I Am The World's Biggest Nerd

Today marks the beginning of my law school's fall semester. My classmates are all embarking on their last first day of school and enjoying life as 3Ls. I can't believe that I'm missing it.

My peers are meeting new Professors in the same familiar classrooms. Cracking open new pages of unlearned caselaw. Scanning new syllabi. Marking new assignments in fresh student planners. Running into each other at the Starbucks across the street before class. And I am sitting on my ass hitting the refresh button on Facebook too many times in one hour while trying to distinguish hunger and poo pains from the onslaught of labor.

I so wish I was at school right now. I love the experience of learning and the feeling of starting a semester fresh. I miss the smell of new (and used) law case books. The feeling of cracking open a casebook and delving into a brand new legal doctrine. Then exploring actual cases that shed light on how that doctrine actually applies. Each case is a new document to decode or translate from legalese into workable english. I like trying to guess the holding of each case after reading the background and the statement of law.

I actually enjoy stringing the cases together into a comprehensive outline- trying to figure out how each one fits into the "big picture." It's like a great big puzzle. I guess I'm like the Indiana Jones of law school.

I love new pens, notebooks, highlighters, printer paper. I love new class schedules and class room numbers that have to be memorized. I love holding a coffee cup in my hand as I stroll the hallways. I love being present among other law students and feeling like almost part of the legal profession. I love being able to start the semester fresh with new resolutions to keep up in readings and to follow along in study guides. I love knowing that by the end of the semester, I will be filled with so much more knowledge than I started with.

My very favorite thing about starting new classes is meeting new professors. Especially intelligent, hot, nerdy male professors who wear bow ties. Yeah, it's a fetish-thing I guess.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

I've Made A Huge Mistake

Of course I didn't realize this until two hours AFTER I had taken the Castor Oil.

Twelve long insufferable hours later and I'm finally able to stand up without something coming out of either end of my body. Sorry about that image.

I may never be able to smell/touch/look at olive or vegetable oil ever again.

What the hell was I thinking?! Oh yeah, I wasn't. As they say, curiosity killed the overdue, desperate pregnant lady.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

10 Things I Can't Wait To Do Again!

To celebrate my due date, I decided to stay positive and think of all the things I'm looking forward to doing again when baby finally decides to come...

1. Sleep on my stomach

2. Relax in a jacuzzi

3. Wear my Real Clothes (as in pants without elastic waist bands)

4. Walk without waddling

5. See the underside of my belly

6. Drink a potent margarita (or two)

7. Wear sexy lingerie

8. Go on a very, very long run

9. Put on panties without falling over

10. Bend over (without having to resort to the feet-apart "Sumo" stance)

Friday, August 22, 2008

Just More Bitterness, Immaturity And Waiting

My cousin became a dad yesterday. I know I should be happy for him. But I'm not. His baby wasn't even due until two weeks after mine. How is that fair at all? I kinda wanted my baby to be the second great grandchild- now his kid gets that glory (I know second isn't as cool as being first- but now my baby has to settle for third and no one cares about third).

I'm so jealous that they don't have to experience the awful last two + weeks of waiting. Everytime I see someone else with a baby, I want to throw a fit worthy of a toddler. I hate that pregnancy is turning me into a fat steaming pile of immaturity!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Crazy Emotions

My OB confirmed today at my appointment that there is absolutely nothing going on "down there." I really thought this week would be different. I was sure baby would give me some sign that he was ready to meet the world. My due date is only three days away- how much longer can he just hang out? It's not like there's a TV in there!

So, my doctor scheduled me for a non stress test next week. I have no idea what that is except that it involves monitoring the baby. My doctor also informed me that if baby doesn't come by then, she will schedule to induce me sometime the week after that- we're talking SEPTEMBER people!! SO NOT COOL.

Scheduling the appointment for next week just made it all sink it. The reality of the fact that I will likely be pregnant for ten more days suddenly weighed down hard on me. I lumbered out of the doctor's office (picture the stride of a bow-legged lumberjack with his head hung low), climbed into my car and had a major melt down. I felt disappointed. Let down. Sad. Depressed. Angry.

Part of me knows that it's best to wait until my body is ready. Part of me rationalizes that ten more days is nothing after waiting nine months. The other part of me DOESN'T GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT RATIONALITY. I want to meet my baby and I want to meet him RIGHT NOW. After nine months of tortue, the least I deserve is for my due date to be accurate.

After my melt down, I took my immediate material happiness into my own hands. I went to the mall and had some General Tsao's chicken. Then I rented two discs of Season One Desperate Housewives. Finally, I went to the grocery store and bought a box of chocolate chip granola bars and Peach Snapple. I was beginning to feel much better already.

As I waited patiently at the back of a long check out line, a grocer lady approached me and, calling me by my last name, she offered to help me at the next check stand. 1. She remembered my name! I was so flattered and felt so special. 2. I went from the back of one line to the very front of the next one.

Granola bar in one hand and my Snapple in the other, I walked out of the store feeling high as a kite.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

At Least My Feet Are Happy

I know the secret to getting rich.

All you have to do is start a wide-spread rumor that the product/service you offer has been known to induce labor. I promise that all the nine month pregnant women on the continent (that's a lot of women) will try it out of sheer desperation. Why? Because waiting to go into labor is WORSE than waiting for law school grades to trickle in. 100 TIMES WORSE!

The common theories of today include walking a lot, having sex, eating spicey food and getting a pedicure. Guess how many women at 39 weeks pregnant are doing all of the above with voracious frequency? I'll tell you. At least one- Me.

This week, I decided to try a foot reflexology treatment. People say hitting certain pressure points in your feet will bring on contractions. Aside from decreasing my checking account by a butt-load, getting my feet all oiled up while I napped and drooled on the spa bed- nothing happened. I feel like a complete idiot for buying into that one.

However, I have no problem with the fact that the other wives tales haven't worked either. It gives me an excuse to 1) get my husband in bed with me as much as I want, 2) eat Mexican and Indian food every night, 3) keep up my running despite my husband's pleas to take it easy (if walking is supposed to help- imagine how much the bouncing of running should work in my favor).

Monday, August 18, 2008

What Part Of "Get Out" Don't You Understand Baby?

I was hopefully optimistic when I planned my last day of work to coincide with the beginning of my 38th week of pregnancy. You know, babies can come early. It happens all the time right? Apparantly not to me. I'm probably destined to be one of those 2 weeks overdue people- which JUST PLAIN SUCKS.

So this is my second week at home and I've completely run out of things to do. I'm so bored out of my mind. Last week I had two young kids over for a sleep over. I sewed some curtains for the nursery. I de-fleaed the cats and either washed or vacuumed every inch of the house. I cooked dinner for my in-laws. I started running. And I already watched like 8 episodes of Desperate Housewives. Seriously. What is left to do?

I'm actually wishing I could go back to work again. I would kill for a legal research project to work on. I even wish I had a horrid memo to write! Maybe I'll read the Housing and Community Development Law book (or various other law books I took from the "free" pile at our school) and start outlining it for fun. Isn't that just ridiculous- outlining for FUN?! This is what the pregnancy waiting game has done to me!

If baby would come sometime this week I would be ecstatic. He's getting so strong that everytime he moves, he either crushes one of my bones or it feels like he's going to tear my belly right open. I'm so uncomfortable- I'm either super hot or super cold. I'm always naseous and hungry. I feel like I'm going to burp and poop at the same time. UGH. PLUS, I'm just so anxious to meet him.

But I have an awful feeling that I will still be pregnant for my 41 week check up.

Well, I finally thought of something I can do: look into various natural induction methods...

Friday, August 15, 2008

A Return To Running

Up until I was 6 months pregnant and before I started my full time summer internship, I was a pregnant running beast. I was averaging 5-8 miles per day and it felt delicious. When I started work (with a 3 hour round trip commute), I just couldn't fit runs into my day or at least I was way too exhausted to try.

Now that I'm done with work and just waiting for the baby to come, I'm starting to get back into running. When I hit the track yesterday for the first time since my 2.5 month recovery, it felt like heaven. I can't believe how much I missed running. I can't believe I allowed myself to miss out on the experience for 2.5 months.

The rythmic (yet waddling) swish of my feet hitting the pavement is like a music all its own. The slight burning of my lungs being pushed beyond capacity and the stinging strain of my calves felt incredible. I jumped right into that run as if I never missed a day. I couldn't keep the silly grin off my face as I completed lap after lap, it felt SO GOOD! I didn't even mind that the high school cheerleading squad gawked at me as they practiced their drills.

For the first time in forever, my mind felt totally and completely peaceful. My body felt like its old self- minus the incredible pressure pushing against my lady parts, of course. Everything felt so right. It was a runner's homecoming.

Of course, it feels very different running at 39 weeks than it did running at 28 weeks. To be honest, I was really scared yesterday and feared that I wouldn't be able to run at all. But it really wasn't bad. My leg musles are in atrophy and need to be coaxed into taking on mileage. The pressure bearing down with each step is also considerable greater. I mean, I am running with a 7 pound weight in me. Even though I'm running slower, I feel like my legs and lungs have to work harder. Also, after the first mile, I usually get pretty crampy (yay! maybe it's inducing labor!). But other than that, running feels just like it always has- euphoric.

Yesterday I managed to keep a running/jogging pace for 2 consecutive miles and today I made it to 2.5. Hopefully I will get up to 3 miles tomorrow but I'm not going to push it. This might sound sick but I can't wait until my post-baby work outs when I can start running harder and increasing my mileage!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

I Totally Thought I Was Going Into Labor

And then I realized I just had to poop.

False alarm.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Are We There Yet?

Another baby/pregnancy post. Being that I am in my 38th week, babies are pretty much the ONLY thing on my mind :)

I went in for my last ultrasound. My doctor thought the last one was wrong because it showed that my baby was HUGE and had a MASSIVE HEAD. Both are bad things for a vaginal birth experience, I guess. Anyway, this ultrasound was much better. It put my baby's weight and size back in the "normal" track.

This was my fourth ultrasound, but they continue to mesmerize me. I couldn't keep my eyes off that "whitenoise" looking screen. Poor baby. He looked so squished in there. I thought I saw his hands waving around by his head but I was surprised to learn that they were his FEET. His feet are in his face!

My husband graciously commented, "If his feet smell anything like yours, I feel really bad for the guy."

I also saw his face again. He already has little chubby cheeks and is practicing moving his tongue around. I swear he was mouthing the words, "Get me outta here," or maybe it was "feed me an ice cream sundae, please."

Then I had my doctor's appointment to do my internal check. The waiting room was unusually empty. Everyone else on the planet must have already had their babies, dang it! The verdict is that I'm still completely closed up. This could be a long two weeks, maybe four (I hope not!). No change at all from last week or the week before that. UGH.

When the doctor was listening to Baby Palmer's heart beat she started staring at my belly and got this weird look on her face. She asked me to hold my breath. What? I was confused and worried but I obliged. Then she laughed and said, "I can see your baby breathing! I can see his chest rise and fall by looking at your belly." Apparently that's not a common thing to see. I remember a couple times putting my hand on my belly and feeling it move rythmically up and down. I thought maybe it was baby hiccups or I was feeling my own pulse. I guess that's what the mystery movement is- Baby Palmer breathing! How cool!

As I left the waiting room I saw a couple bring their five day old twins in. The babies were so tiny- around five pounds each- and so sweet! Seeing newborns makes me super anxious to meet Baby Palmer.

For now, I'll just follow his orders and feed him an ice cream sundae.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Adding Insult To Pregnancy

I'll admit that I'm shallow and insecure and that whenever I get hit on (whether the guy is decent or a bum) I come home and brag about it to my husband. I don't know why I do this. Maybe I like to let him know that some lunatic singled ME out of a handful of passerbys to berate with desperate cat calling. Or maybe I like to remind my husband that other people find me somewhat attractive and that he should be lucky to have me. Or maybe I just like to make him jealous.

However, cat calls and desperate flirting is NOT flattering when you're nine month pregnant. Rather, it's down right insulting.

Today, I was walking to the ferry when a guy on a park bench winked at me and called out, "How YOU doin'."

I ignored him and walked three feet before some teenager on a bicycle yells to me, "Hey, you dropped something!" I had my hands full so I turned around to see what I dropped. That's when he smiled mischeviously and said, "you dropped your smile."

First of all, that's the worst attempt at flirting I have EVER heard. I dropped my smile? What the hell? That's not an attempted compliment or a flamboyant inuendo. It's simply lame. But what should I expect from an un-seasoned 15 year old. Young padawon has a lot to learn if he wants to get lucky with a comment like that.

Secondly, yelling out to a nine month pregnant lady is not flattering or even funny. It's plain disgusting. Not to mention, insulting. It's like calling a fat kid "slim" and asking if he likes cake. It's like tripping an old man with a cane- and then punching him in the back while he's still planted face first on the ground. Like asking a one-legged kid to a race. Or asking a bald person with cancer who their hair stylist is.

I'm tired, nauseous, huge, waddling and definately FAR from being the object of anyone's desire. Especially now since I looked in the mirror and noticed that I've been walking around sporting a HUGE ketchup stain on the bottom of my shirt. It's located on the bottom of my belly (the southern hemisphere of my globe) and, apparently, visible to the entire plant but me.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Fleas and Romance

My cats have fleas. UGH. Gross. I hate bugs. Especially bugs that bite, gnaw and jump.

They have been itching for a while but I didn't even think it could be fleas until I saw one jump right off of my cat today. I was traumatized. I hopped immediately into my car and sped to the grocery store to buy flea killer.

First of all, fleas are impossible to kill. Seriously. Remember the superhero cartoon The Tick? That's a great idea for a superhero considering how un-crushable fleas and ticks are. I could probably shoot a three pointer before I could successfully crush a flea between my fingers.

De-fleaing a cat is definately a two person job. I don't know how the old single ladies with a million cats do it on their own. My husband had to hold the cats down while I combed them and drowned the fleas in rubbing alcohol. We finally got a system down and the result was a massive flea-genocide. Poor flea bag kitties!

I have to say that de-fleaing our cats together was kind of romantic in a sick way. It was one of those everyday mundane moments that is made better simply because you have someone you love to do it with you. By the end of the task, we also shared the paranoia that we were now covered in fleas. When one of us would itch randomly, we exchanged knowing looks. I hope it's just our imagination playing tricks on us.

I couldn't help but think how cute my husband was in sharing my concern for our itchy babies. Really, it was almost enough for me to throw down the flea comb and bottle of rubbing alcohol and take him right there on the kitchen floor. Almost. Then he scratched his leg and all I could think about were itty bitty, crawly, biting fleas.

Nothing To Do But Have A Baby

Yay, work is done. Boo, work is done.

It was kind of a relief to put work behind me. The last two weeks have been especially difficult forcing myself to be motivated enough to get out the door. The ferry boat seats were starting to get uncomfortable. I was getting so fed up with people staring at me like I'm a spectacle too-at least they should have the decency to be inconspicuous in their gawking. Then I had the uphill walk to work. The time it took me to battle those hills was steadily increasing. I noticed that I was getting to work a little later each day. But it was a good work out I guess.

The past three months I mostly stayed in my office and work fervently on my projects. I really only chatted with the attorneys I worked with. But I was surprised at how many other people seemed genuinely sad to see me go. I thought they barely knew I was there. But I got hugs from a lot of unexpected people. The partners told me I could come back next summer too!

I had a great experience writing real motions and researching all kinds of interesting legal issues. The attorneys went out of their way to involve me in the strategies of litigation and to make sure I was learning the ropes. I think I know what is expected of a first year associate now. I'm a lot more confident in my abilities too. But all that said, I'm ready to be done! This is my first real break from law since Christmas break and I'm totally gonna eat it up.

At the same time, I wish I extended my termination date by a thousand weeks. Now I have nothing to keep my mind off being pregnant. I have nothing to occupy myself as I go through the infamous "waiting game." Now, I actually HAVE to have a baby. There is no backing out now.

Last week I was anxious to be done and to just meet the baby. Now that it's looming over my head and could practically happen anyday, I'm getting a little freaked out.

The magnitude of how our lives will change and what I will have to go through is starting to dawn on me. It's not just a fun game- it's not like waiting nine months for the best concert of all time. It's a major event and it changes your life forever. Plus, it involves IV's, pain, hospitals and sharp needles....yikes. It's not just a "someday" looming over the horizon. It's actually gonna happen. And supposedly, it will happen in less than two weeks!

Excuse me while I run to the store to rent two weeks worth of Desperate Housewives re-runs to keep my mind from thinking about it. And two weeks worth of powdered donut holes.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

The Furry Babies

I'm not talking about the newborns that come out looking like Cousin-It (although my baby nephew still has a ton of dark arm and back hair that he was born with). I mean the pets...

My cats are acting so weird lately. The past couple of weeks I have noticed that they are a lot more needy. They follow me from room to room. They walk right in front of my feet (causing me to swear loudly and almost trip). They jump up on my lap more. And, the absolute worst, they whine all the time.

My cats never used to meow unless they wanted inside or outside or unless we accidentally locked them in a room. Now their meowing is not only incessant but it takes the form of a loud and high pitched whine.

They beg for pets all the time! If I ignore them long enough, they go sit by my husband looking for some love. I'm starting to wonder if they sense the coming change in our lives. Do they know that soon they will be competing with a newborn for affection? Can they sense pregnancy? I've been pregnant for almost nine months but they have only started acting funny recently.

Has anyone else noticed changes in their pets' behavior when they were pregnant?

If they weren't so cute I would be half tempted to lock them in a crate, FOREVER!

Evil Pregnancy, Your Days Are Numbered!

I talked with my doctor and she confirmed that my due date is, in fact, the 23rd and not the 29th. Wow. So, I'll be 38 weeks in a couple days. Scary. That means a baby could be here any day.

Of course, knowing my luck I will end up being two weeks overdue. *knocking on wood* that that DOESN'T happen. This is the third week the doctor has checked me and my body is giving no sign that it plans on letting the kid out soon.

I was in the waiting room and the girl next to me was having mild contractions not very close together. She was talking about how she was so excited and that she expected to have a baby in 24 hours. Then she said she just turned 37 weeks and was glad that she would get out of three weeks of pregnancy. That's so NOT what I wanted to hear. I'm so jealous. B*TCH. I hope she's having nothing more than evil braxton hicks contractions. Or I hope that baby's big fat head puts her through 48 hours of labor. Or it comes out looking like one of those creepy furry gremlins that I still have nightmares about. Or worse, like Pee Wee Herman!

Ok I know that's really harsh and totally uncalled for and that I would give anything to be in her shoes, but I'm so sick of being pregnant. And it seems like the entire world is having their babies before me. Plus I have an annoying zit on my sun-burned shoulder and it's completely RUINING MY LIFE.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

That One Damn Case

You know how awful it is when your entire argument goes to shit because you discovered one obsolete case tucked away in the far corner of Westlaw?

I've been working with an associate on a motion to dismiss. In our motion we basically argue everything- lack of subject matter jurisdiction, lack of general personal jurisdiction, lack of "specific" personal jurisdiction under the Long Arm statute, improper service and forum non conveniens. Yes, we are basically throwing the entire Civil Procedure book at our opponents.

I had a lot of the arguments all set up. I had research the relevant and supporting analogous cases. I carefully compared the facts of our case with the facts of these supporting cases. I was ready to go and very proud. Then I found THE CASE. I found it completely by accident. I was searching for a case to an unrelated issue when I stumbled upon this awful case that fit our fact pattern EXACTLY. The crazy thing is, the court used a completely different standard than the mainstream cases. Problem 1: it is unflagged and therefore not challenged or overturned. Probem 2: it's binding on our court.


So it looks like we will continue with our arguments anyway and hope to god that this case is so hidden that, like us, our opponents will have a hard time finding it.

Litigation is so exciting sometimes.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Odds 'n Ends

When I went in to pre-register at the hospital last week, the registering nurse had a copy of my medical chart from my OB. When she left the room to grab something, I took a peek at it. I've always been curious about what my OB sribbles on that clipboard.

It had mostly boring things like my fundal height measurements and a graph of my weight gain. Then I looked at the top of the chart where my due date was written. I was told at my first ultrasound that my due date is Aug 29th. The due date my OB has recorded is Aug 23rd. OMG, that's like a total week difference! I've been one week ahead this whole time? That means instead of being 36 weeks, I'm 37 weeks- full term! That throws my whole perception of this pregnancy off. But it also brings me one week closer to a baby!


I was scanning the latest gossips blogs when I caught site of a headline about the release of the Brangelina twins photos.

Me: "wow, the pics of Brad and Angelina's twins are published!"
Husband: "Yup."
Me: "I didn't know that! I wonder what they look like."
Husband: "They look like babies..."

That's such a typical guy response.


This weekend was my family's third annual family reuinion, called [insert family name]-Fest. It's becoming a famous event as new people are invited each year. Each year there is a special theme. The first year was a luau/Octoberfest celebration (hence the name). Last year it was Survivor themed and we had to break up into tribes and complete challenges. This year was a circus theme.

No matter what the theme, SOMEHOW the festivities always include my dad and his brothers being forced to dress as women. They usually don dresses, makeup, boob stuffing, and sometimes bikini coconuts. Each year it gets easier and easier to coax them into dressing in drag. I'm beginning to think they secretly enjoy it by now. They love all that attention as the crowd hoots and hollers at them. Bonus: each year I bring my camera and collect extra bits of blackmail to use against my dad. :)

Friday, August 1, 2008

Google: Parenting For Dummies

An associate at work today told me a funny story. This is how non-parent attorneys learn about baby care:

The associate was watching her sister's newborn when the baby became really fussy. She called her sister who told her that he might have become unwrapped from his swaddle and, if so, she just needed to re-swaddle him.

She, however, had no idea what a swaddle was or how to do one. Rather than telling her sister this, she turned to the fanastic world wide web. She quickly googled "how to swaddle a baby," read some quick step by step instructions, studied the diagrams, and then practiced on her nephew.

He stopped crying immediately.

When my mom had me, her first baby, she had to call my grandma for advice on how to do EVERYTHING. I wonder how grandmas would feel knowing that society's need for them is becoming obsolete. Or that they are being replaced by the internet- a thing they know absolutely nothing about.