Friday, September 12, 2008


"Giving birth" (seems weird to use that phrase when the doctors sliced me open and pulled the baby out) not only brought me a baby. It brought me my own precious pair of Astroboobs.

I had no idea boobs could inflate so much overnight. It's like the boob fairy popped by one night after Jacob was born and sprinkled me with boob dust. Hey I'm not going to complain. Oh wait. Yes I am. While my pre-pregnancy, boob-envious, AA self would never have fathomed complaining of D sized Hooters-worthy knockers, this is not entirely what I had imagined.

I mean, they serve an actual purpose. A very unsexual purpose. While Jacob surely appreciates them, they really do me no good right now. (TMI ALERT) I have no sex drive. Even if I did, there's nothing I could do about it for the next couple weeks- doctor's orders. I can't even show them off to my husband because everytime I expose one, I put the population in jeopardy of a world wide milk flood. And um, they're HARD, not the soft and squishy brand of boob that I'm particularly fond of.

The one plus about Postpartum Astroboobs: I look great in any shirt. And for once in my life, I have a larger rack than my sister. And seriously, in the world of sister rivalry, what else matters?

And just because I'm obsessed with posting pictures of Jacob (a.k.a. Stinky, Tooter, Mr. Poops, and Binky Man)...


LEO said...

I would say at least half of the benefit of big boobs is looking good in shirts, well any clothing really... so since you can't exactly use them for "fun" you might as well enjoy looking good for the public and trumping your sister!

And... I think your son is getting cuter everyday! We love the pictures :)

the dragonfly said...

He's so adorable!!!

My breasts grew some...but not much. And I never made enough milk and my milk was completely gone after less than three months even though I pumped constantly!! (once we had to give him formula he wouldn't nurse anymore, he would only take a bottle.) So at least you don't have to worry about those problems, right?

Oh, and I remember having no sex drive. It'll come back. :)

Someone Being Me said...

He is so beautiful. I miss that newborn stage.