Aftermath

Who was I before I started studying for the bar exam? What did I do with myself? The exam is over now and I keep asking these questions because I find myself with an insane amount of free time. My two month packed schedule of studying, and studying and more studying has suddenly been wiped clean (for a week at least, then I start work). The whole bar exam process kinda took away my human-ness. For two months, I wasn't human. I was a not-so-well-oiled studying machine. Now I feel like a real person again and I don't know what to do with myself!

Three days post bar, I'm still exhausted. Mentally and physically. They are right when they say the bar is an endurance test. Imagine taking three law school exams back to back each day for 2.5 days. Yeah, that's EXACTLY what the bar exam is. I really need to just sleep for 24 hours straight to recover, but I have a toddler, and a husband, so that's not going to happen. I think I'll just be tired for a couple more days until I catch enough naps to fully re-energize.

Right now I'm enjoying the free time. I'm the kind of person who always takes on more than I should (see: lawschool & marriage & baby & commuter). I can take an empty day on my calendar and fill it with tasks in no time, hey it's a gift. I don't like to lay around. I thrive on feeling productive and collapsing exhausted into my bed at night. But for now, I'm kinda enjoying lazing the days away with my family. Granted, my idea of "lazing" involves: hosting a game night, chasing a busy 18 month old, trying out new recipes from Cooks Illustrated, half marathon training, baking salted oatmeal white chocolate chip cookies (my new favorite!), doing laundry and cleaning the house.

I can't believe I have to wait until April 30th to find out the results of the exam. I'm still living high off the fact that I finished in one piece. And I feel like I did well enough to pass- but you never know. You CAN'T exactly know when you failed to spot issues. I just never want to go through that again. That was probably the hardest thing I've ever done. If I had to choose between another emergency C-section with a brutal 2 week recovery or re-taking the bar exam, I don't know, it's a close call!