Sunday, May 11, 2008

One Good Thing About Exams

I know how crazy this sounds but finals have actually been a nice break from my pregnancy. Not that anyone can take a break and stop being pregnant but I've been able to stop thinking about being pregnant every second of the day.

Since I saw those positive pink lines on my pregnancy test, every waking thought has been consumed by the baby or pregnancy in general. It's as if when you become pregnant, you also become obsessed and possessed with it. My husband can resume his normal routine and his life and not be constantly reminded of his impending parenthood, I cannot. The knowledge of a baby growing inside you is something you take with you everywhere. It's the elephant in the room of your mind. In class, at the movies, on dates, hanging with friends, grocery shopping. Being pregnant is something I am always aware of and thinking about. It's not a bad thing, in fact, most of my thoughts are happy ones. It's just exhausting sometimes.

During this time of preparing for finals, I have been so worried and caught up in doing well (and so freaked out about the many classes I skipped and the many assignments I purposefully neglected) that I have occassionally let pregnancy slip from my mind. After a two hour power study session I suddenly realized I was hungry. "Oh yeah, I'm pregnant." I realized that for the first time ever, I had just been pre-pregnant me.

In completing my public benefits take home exam, I was in the middle of formulating a due process argument when I read a case about a woman qualifying for Medicaid for maternity care. It hit me again, "oh yeah, I'm pregnant."

While thinking about exams and reading case law isn't THAT exciting. It has been nice to take a mental break from pregnancy and let something new consume my thoughts. On the other hand, I can't wait to turn in my final exam so that I can start painting and shopping for the nursery.


postscript said...

It's funny how things you don't necessarily like/enjoy can take your mind off just about anything.

Someone Being Me said...

It does occupy your mind. Just wait until the baby is actually here. It will be hard to go 5 minutes without thinking or saying something baby related. Its just one of those things.

Don Mills Diva said...

I loved that about the second trimester - enjoy it 'cause around eight months or so it becomes all-consuming again!