Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Itinerary For An Ulcer

Guess what? I survived!!! I survived my first day back at school. And I only got teary eyed twice about leaving Jacob.

Phew. Jacob woke up to eat at 4:30 am (it seems more daunting when I add the "am" part) and after I fed him I couldn't fall asleep. So I watched the numbers change on my clock until 5:55. Then I dragged myself out of bed, packed my bags, packed Jacob up and left the house.

We left at 6:30, drove to my parent's house where I dropped Jacob off, and then I hitched a ride downtown. I caught the 7:55 ferry to Seattle and FINALLY hopped on a bus to school. I arrived five minutes after my 9:00 class had started. I did the same thing for my reverse commute home. That's a 2.5 hour commute ONE WAY. I spent exaclty the same amount of time commuting today as I did sleeping- this is very disturbing.

The good news is: I was WAY too busy to be tired. Five back to back classes for the most part with barely enough time to pump (in a gross bathroom stall that smelled like POOP) and choke down lunch in between.

Seriously, HOW do you working/student Moms in the legal profession do it???!!! I can't imagine doing this only twice a week. How do you remember to pack a diaper bag, school bag, lunch, breast pump, breast milk AND baby? How do you stay sane? Or is sanity the ultimate sacrifice?

So, not only did I survive, but I actually LEARNED stuff.

I learned that a bank is a creditor. I always imagined a bank as a big storage unit for all my dollar bills. I never actually thought about how the bank takes my money and uses it. So I really just give all my money to a bank for nothing in return…and then they spend it? Oooh, so now I get what this recession is all about.

Secondly, I learned that, yes, people sound just as ridiculous when they use the word "moreover" in oral discussion as they do when they use it in colloquial conversation. Thank you Mr. IQ in the front row. Your present for being so vocally impressive is a million imaginary slaps in the face and one huge exasperated sigh of hatred.

Also, if you take a shower right before bed your hair dries in the shape of a massive bird's nest… Siimilarly, when you sleep on your face, your eyelashes dry in a 90 degree upward angle as if they were reaching for the sky and no matter how many times you lather spit on them, they refuse to be corrected.

Oh and corporate governance makes me want to projectile vomit stomach vile out of my eyeballs.

A professor becomes five times hotter after he casually drops the fact that he has not only met Obama but that he might get to meet him again at the Inaguration.

Finally, is it just me or do all the vain primping socialites in class seems extra annoying after you have had a baby? Why is that? The girl next to me emailed her friend in the middle of class to ask "would you say my hair color is the same as that girl in the second row?" Say What?

7 comments:

CM said...

Congratulations on getting through your first day! Sounds like you have a tough schedule.

FSD said...

Congrats on surviving day 1!!! BTW, your commute sounds BRUTAL!!! And to think that I whine about my 45 min commute.

gudnuff said...

Excellent post! I agree with FSD: absolutely BRUTAL commute/schedule. God grant you the strength and endurance for what lies ahead (and I really mean that). Good thing is that it has an ending...not sure that helps right now, though.

Eyelashes: I get that all the time. My right eye's lashes are always way perkier than my left eye's due to my preferred sleeping position. My solution is to carry an eyelash curler in my bag and force the left eye to at least match. They refuse to be straightened (spit? never thought of that, myself), but you can get them to bend in a more reasonalbe, uniform manner that is more socially acceptable if you use the eyelash curler on each them. It's fun to do on public transportation, too. Kinda freaks people out. Post a picture of you "fixing" the angularity of your lashes while on the ferry. That would be so cool.

Anyway, congratuations indeed. You can do this. Twice a week is manageable. Right?

LEO said...

Yay, one day down, way too many to go!

So do you nap or read or just relax during your commute? I can't imagine that!

And also, schools should totally offer a room to pump. I only have a max of 10 min b/w classes, most of which I spend packing and unpacking my stuff and transferring classrooms, so I can't really do it at school, but if I had a bigger break, I would be asking the Deans for something!

Good luck with keeping up the schedule, I'm sure Jacob is doing well w/ Grandma time!

newduck said...

Lawsie, lawsie, your commute is INSANE. As for balancing law school and a law career with motherhood, it only gets easier. Before you know it you're in the groove and you have your routine down. As for pumping in the bathroom... ick. That never gets better. But after a while I had the best bathrooms scoped out, and the good news is that they don't nurse forever!

MJV said...

Congratulations!!

Anonymous said...

You should seriousy ask your deans for a room to pump in. A friend last year who was nursing initially was pumping in the bathrooms. While there had been other nursing students before, I don't think any of them had ever asked the administration for a more private place. When she asked, the dean found a room for her nearly immediately. It's worth a shot at least.