Sunday, January 24, 2010

Bar Prep Is Good For Something

The bar exam is really just a very very cruel form of punishment disguised as a way to prove your "competency" as a lawyer. It sucks. It sucks so bad. I'd rather pull out each of my own teeth one by one ("The Hangover" style) than continue to study for this stupid test. I wake up dreading each day. I go to bed each night dreading that I have to wake up dreading each day. My entire existence right now is full of misplaced anger wanting to take root into something and suck it DRY.

Basically, bar prep makes me hate myself. It's really THAT horrible.

But I did find one independant use for it thus far. If bar prep is entirely useless in every other way, it is at least a good way to (1) get your friends to excommunicate you or (2) entertain them with some legal drudgery.

This afternoon as we were wandering thrugh the mall, I noticed one of our cd/music stores was closing. The sign on the entrance said, "All fixtures for sale." At first I just caught a glimpse of the sign, thought "who wants a bunch of old metal cd-shelves" and continued my mental trek towards a far more exciting destination (like should I have cinnamon rolls, ice cream or bubble tea for dinner). But then I stopped. Wait. Did that sign just say "fixtures?" OMG!

I looked at my husband and released my messy diarrhea (why can't I ever spell that word without consulting a dictionary? Why was it never on one of my elementary school spelling lists?!) of the legal mouth all over him:

"Did you read that sign?!"
"It said 'All fixtures for sale."
"Do you know what?"
"I know the legal definiton of a fixture!"
"A fixture is an item of personal property intended to by phsyically and permanently attached to a piece of real property and the use of which is intended to be integrated into the use of real property!"
"Oh and you know what?"
"A tenant can generally install fixtures without a commercial landlord's consent and may ALSO remove the fixtures before the end of the leasehold estate as long as he repairs the damage caused by their removal."
"I learned that from bar bri!"

My husband just stares at me, blinking blankly.

"Ok, I just thought I'd share."

Husband then replies: "Can we have hotdogs for dinner?"