Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Don't You Just Hate That?

You are in a big building with dead end corridors everywhere you turn and staircases leading you into a never ending maze. Bullets whiz by you and explosions burst from every which way. You suddeny realize you are being attacked by terrorists.

Then a big hunky man emerges from the fray. Tall and slender but with muscles that would make The Rock green with envy. "Down!" He instructs, holding you to the floor with his body as a bullet flies by your face. "Stay here!" Then he's off, muscles and all, down the hall to stop the attack, save the building and save your life.

He's gone a while but you're too afraid to move. You sit in the dark, trembling. Hoping the terrorist attack stops. After a while, the explosions stop. All is quiet. You hear something coming down the hall towards you, it's heavy footsteps. Your gut tightens and you try to make yourself as small as possible, hidden in the corner. Then a tall figure approaches. His manly frame is backlit but you immediately recognize him as your Hunky Hero. He limps towards you, his shoulder is bandaged.

"What happened?" You ask, pointing to the stranger's shoulder. "Ah, that's nothing. Got caught in the crossfire. But it's over now. They're gone." He slowly comes towards you. "How about you. Are you ok?"

"I'm fine." You assure him, still feeling flustered.

"I can see that." He replies, with a mischevious smirk. He continues to approach you. Your heart feels like it's on fire and your blood is pulsing on overdrive. He wraps his big, strong arms around you like he is going to lift you up, but he doesn't. You can smell gunpowder and sweat on his skin (so manly!). Then he leans his body into yours. Slowly. Slowly. His eyes, intently focused on yours, read your desires like an open book. Your lips are just a finger breadth apart from his now. And then....

You wake up to the sound of a screaming toddler. Who probably just took the world's largest shit in his diaper. It's 7:32 am. Your eyelids are heavy. And you have to face a full day of Criminal Procedure lecture.

DON'T YOU JUST HATE THAT?!

6 comments:

CM said...

Make it 6 a.m. and a 30 Rock-inspired dream involving Alec Baldwin, and I'm right there with you.

LL said...

You can't write things like that for an unsuspecting pregnant woman who isn't allowed to have sex to read!

But in spite of the frustration, it still made me laugh, a lot, while I sit here working on an assignment I'm tired of and keep hoping will go away. Thanks for that!

je said...

aw, shucks! finish the story on your blog!!

Juliet said...

Could this Hero have been...your father-in-law?

Soleil said...

HA! Amazing...

Proto Attorney said...

If you give up the career in law, take up a career in action-adventure smut. Is hawtness.