A Probe, A Bean, and Vomit Painted Tiles

Today, surprisingly, I got a call from our doctor (whom I haven't even seen yet!). She made an appointment for us to have an ultrasound- today! We got to the ultrasound office where they made me wear a backless hopsital gown, without underwear! This was really unfair considering that the old man I passed in the hallway wearing a similar gown was allowed to wear his white briefs. I really don't know why I didn't look away. When the coast was clear, I ran from my changing room to the ultrasound room, clutching the gown around my behind.

The nurse made me lay down on the bed, rubbed warm goo all over my tummy and tried to take an external ultrasound. Guess what? I have another reason to hate my bowel movements. Since I was so "full," which the nurse was kind enough to point out several times, they couldn't see the baby. "Looks like we have to do a vaginal ultrasound" she said calmly.

WHAT? WHAT THE HECK? NO WAY! NOTHING GOES IN THERE THAT I DON'T APPROVE OF!

"gulp, um, ok" I replied. I'm pretty sure I looked like I was going to die along with all my modesty.

In the end it turned out ok, well, considering....We found out that I'm actually only six weeks pregnant. It's frustrating that I have to add days to my pregnancy ticker. Here I thought we were almost 8 weeks closer to the end and turns out I was two weeks off. Two weeks is a long time- a fortnight to be exact- alot can happen in two weeks. darn...

It was weird to see the picture of the baby, he/she just looked like a bean-size dot with a bright center. Apparently the bright center was the baby's heart and I could see it flicker with each beat. The best part, however, was listening to the heart beat. 120 beats/minutes. Wow, there is an itty bitty drum inside me....amazing. I know I cried but I don't know if it was because of hearing my baby for the first time- having actual proof that we really made a baby- or because of the cold, uncomfortable probe poking around inside me.

When the whole ordeal was over, after I recovered my decency and my panties (after Husband suggested I get a "sexy" hospital gown to wear at home and I punched him in the arm), I stopped at a cafe to get lunch. That's when I started feeling dizzy and light headed. After I paid for my salad I plopped into the nearest chair. I put my head between my legs, grabbed the paper bag my lunch was packed in (took out the lunch first, of course) and enjoyed my first pregnancy vomit.

I can't actually be sure if it was from being pregnant or from being inside a medical facility. I have a history of fainting after getting physical exams, trips to the orthodontists, and after receiving shots. One time, twenty minutes after a Hep B immunity shot, I was walking down the school hallway to my class when, according to some gawking fifth graders, I lost all life in my limbs, turned white, and fell to the floor like a paper doll.

I'm destined for an exciting labor....is it possible to faint multiple times in a row and still successfully give birth.